SEC coaches and their teams are moving onto Week 2. Media members, however, are still having Week 1 fun.
ESPN’s Ryan McGee roasted Tennessee and a few other SEC programs in his post-Week 1 “Bottom 10.”
Following the home loss to Georgia State, Tennessee checks in at No. 4, with a new nickname:
4. Rocky Slop (0-1)
Wait, you Tennessee fans thought you were off the hook because of that overwritten opening story about your loss to Georgia State Not Southern? Not a chance. And yes, I’m a Tennessee graduate with a Knoxville-raised wife and four best friends whom I met on campus. In related news, moments after these rankings were posted I was informed I am now friendless, divorced and under investigation for academic fraud.
McGee gave the Vols their own spot, but he don’t forget about the other conference teams that lost in Week 1 (Missouri, South Carolina, Ole Miss) or the programs that didn’t quite impress in their season-opening victories (Arkansas, Florida):
5. S-E-C! S-E-C!
Wait, you Missouri fans thought you were off the hook because another SEC team made the rankings? Same for you over there, dude in your Landshark Ole Miss hoodie. And you too, Cocky. And yeah, guy with the Hog on his head, don’t be bragging about that squeaker over Portland State. And Florida, have you stopped showering yet to wash off the grime of Week Zero? Congratulations, you’re all sharing the Coveted Fifth Spot this week. Also, I’ve got the Pac-12 on the other line to say thank y’all for taking the Week 1 heat off of them. You know what “Just means more” now? Week Two, that’s what.
McGee’s full Bottom 10 can be read here. We’ll see if the above teams can climb out of the rankings in Week 2.
Andrew writes about sports to fund his love of live music and collection of concert posters. He strongly endorses the Hall of Fame campaigns of Fred Taylor and Andruw Jones.
