I’m warning you. You’re gonna be upset with my way-too-early ranking of SEC quarterbacks heading into 2024.

You’re not going to like where I have your quarterback ranked. You’re going to read this list, call me a hater, and then proceed to assume that I’m an idiot.

Fair enough. I’ve been called worse.

I’m not a hater. I’m a realist. The quarterback position in the SEC is deep. Five guys will enter the year worthy of preseason All-SEC love, another 5 guys are first-time starters that could end up there and then there’s the rest. To be clear, this is based on who these players are right now, and not where I think they’ll end up by the end of 2024.

Still, though. It’s tough. That’s why I’ll avoid being called a hater and I’ll instead list the 1 thing I like about each guy.

Here are my way-too-early SEC quarterback rankings for 2024:

16. Taylen Green, Arkansas

One thing I like — How many guys on this list were QB1 in a bowl game in which they scored 4 touchdowns and averaged 15 yards/pass attempt for an offense that put up 44 points? Just 1, and it was Green in Boise State’s beatdown of UNLV.

15. LaNorris Sellers, South Carolina

One thing I like — Like, besides the fact that the dude rocks rec specs just like my all-time favorite athlete Horace Grant? OK. In 1 season as Spencer Rattler’s backup, Sellers has 9 touches, and he turned that into 137 yards and 3 touchdowns. Don’t worry about who the majority of that production came against (FCS Furman).

14. Payton Thorne, Auburn

One thing I like — He’s getting a full offseason of reps in the Hugh Freeze offense, which he didn’t have last year. Alright, that’s pretty weak. How about the fact that the only returning SEC quarterback with more rushing yards than Thorne was Jalen Milroe? I’m trying here.

13. Diego Pavia, Vanderbilt

One thing I like — All I’ve gotta do is circle back to that $1.7 million afternoon on The Plains and say “31-10.”

12. Blake Shapen, Mississippi State

One thing I like — I hate defaulting to career stats because they often don’t tell the full story, so instead of just mentioning that Shapen had 5,574 career passing yards in 2-plus seasons as Baylor’s starter, I’ll add that his winning effort in that 2021 Big 12 Championship wherein Oklahoma State was an inch short had a monumental say in the Playoff picture that year.

11. Brock Vandagriff, Kentucky

One thing I like — We don’t have any evidence to suggest that Vandagriff isn’t worthy of the 5-star billing that he got in the 2021 class. We just have brief snippets of promise in lopsided Georgia games, spring game efforts, coach quotes and workout videos wherein he looks like a lumberjack capable of chopping down an entire forest if he desired.

10. Jackson Arnold, Oklahoma

One thing I like — After starting 3-for-8 with 2 interceptions in his first career start in the bowl game, Arnold’s rest-of-game numbers were much better. He finished his night by going 23-for-37 for 353 yards with 2 touchdowns and an interception, along with 38 rushing yards to remind us all that Dillon Gabriel’s transfer to Oregon and Jeff Lebby’s departure for Mississippi State was by no means a death sentence for the OU offense.

9. Graham Mertz, Florida

One thing I like — Here’s the list of returning Power 5 quarterbacks who completed 70% of their passes while throwing for at least 20 touchdown passes:

  • Carson Beck, Georgia
  • Noah Fifita, Arizona
  • Graham Mertz, Florida

8. Conner Weigman, Texas A&M

One thing I like — In his 7 full games as a starter in his career (excluding 2023 Auburn), Weigman lived up to the 5-star billing with a 16-2 TD-INT ratio. The 2 interceptions were both at Miami, and they happened because Ainias Smith slipped on a route, and later, Weigman was trying to make a play on 4th down in the final minute with the Aggies trailing 48-33 because the A&M secondary got shredded.

7. Nico Iamaleava, Tennessee

One thing I like — Before the Citrus Bowl, the last quarterback to lead a 35-point effort against Iowa was CJ Stroud in 2022. Then Iamaleava did that while scoring 4 touchdowns (3 rushing, 1 passing) in his first career start and I/every Tennessee fan on earth swooned.

6. Garrett Nussmeier, LSU

One thing I like — I’ll always say that when TCU was in the midst of the 65-7 beatdown against Georgia, it should’ve been allowed to bring Nussmeier in at halftime, just like LSU did when Jayden Daniels went down late in the first half of the SEC Championship and all he did was throw for 294 yards against the future national champs.

5. Brady Cook, Mizzou

One thing I like — Here’s the list of the returning Power 5 quarterbacks who threw for 3,000 yards, 20 touchdown passes and ran for at least 5 scores:

  • Brady Cook, Mizzou
  • Jaxson Dart, Ole Miss
  • Quinn Ewers, Texas
  • Dillion Gabriel, Oregon
  • Cam Ward, Miami (FL)

4. Jaxson Dart, Ole Miss

One thing I like — A year ago, I wasn’t sold on Dart because of the dropoff against FBS teams with a winning record (he had a 7-7 TD-INT ratio with a 126.7 QB rating and he averaged 7.3 yards/attempt). In those games in 2023, he was No. 8 in the country in QB rating (160.8) with a 12-3 TD-INT ratio and he averaged 9.7 yards/attempt.

3. Jalen Milroe, Alabama

One thing I like — Contrary to the belief that he couldn’t throw the football — Michael Penix Jr. also struggled against Michigan and he was the best pure passer in America — Milroe finished with a quarterback rating of 172.2, which is better than any returning Power 5 quarterback.

2. Quinn Ewers, Texas

One thing I like — It’s lazy to just say that Ewers led Texas to its best season since Colt McCoy’s 2009 national runner-up squad, so I’ll instead point to how the trimmed-down version of Ewers had 15 touchdown passes in road/neutral-site games, which is the most of any returner who played at the Power 5 level in 2023 (he also completed 71% of his passes for 9.1 yards/attempt in those games).

1. Carson Beck, Georgia

One thing I like — I’m showing great restraint to just settle on 1 thing I like here because I’ve been leading the Beck bandwagon for a while. I gave Stetson Bennett IV the No. 3 spot on my Heisman Trophy ballot because of how dominant he was against teams that finished ranked in the AP Top 25 (teams that actually ended up being good). His successor, Beck, then posted a QB rating of 174.8 in those games, which was second among players with multiple games vs. AP Top 25 finishers … only to Jayden Daniels. Not too shabby.