SEC desperation rankings: Well, that escalated quickly
Week 5 might not bring the marquee, blockbuster SEC matchups that we’re used to, but there’s still plenty on the line. Some teams are feeling really good about where they’re at, and other teams … not so much. So we ranked the 10 teams playing this weekend in order of how desperate they are heading into Saturday, and provided a scale so you can get a sense of their level of desperation.
From most to least desperate, here are the official Week 5 SEC Desperation Rankings:
1. South Carolina
Desperation level: Trying to reconnect with a high school crush on Facebook.
Nobody is feeling the pressure more than Will Muschamp and the Gamecocks on Saturday. Muschamp’s hot seat seems to be getting hotter each week and the holes he’s punching in locker walls are probably only getting bigger. South Carolina is already 1-3, and a loss to Kentucky to bring them to 1-4 would just about put a wrap on the Gamecocks’ season.
2. Texas A&M
Desperation level: Betting on preseason football games.
In theory, the Aggies shouldn’t have to worry too much about beating Arkansas on Saturday.. but if they did lose that game, it would send the A&M fan base to previously thought to be unreachable levels of despair. With how the Aggies’ schedule works out, just making it to a bowl game might become a challenge. If you drop one against the worst team in the SEC West, it’ll be a long offseason for Jimbo Fisher and his beloved buyout.
Desperation level: Buying a Corvette in you mid-50s.
Kentucky football really needs some good news. They’ve lost 2 very winnable games in a row and took a week of bad press just because Kash Daniel might have tried to rip off a Florida quarterback’s ankle. Now they face another easily winnable game against South Carolina. If Kentucky doesn’t win this one, … well, basketball starts soon.
Desperation level: Minor League baseball promotions.
Vandy gave up a lot of points against LSU, and that might be the understatement of the year. The rest of the SEC slate looks to be pretty rough on the Commodores, so a win against Northern Illinois could provide a rare moment to celebrate in 2019. If that doesn’t happen, well, good luck.
Desperation level: Eating the new KFC fried donut sandwich.
Auburn is setting itself up to be every bit the contender that Alabama, Georgia and LSU are, but a loss to Mississippi State could upend all that. You would think that Auburn would be well aware of that and be way more confident than desperate, but this is Auburn after all. Weird things happen.
Desperation level: Starting a podcast.
Trying to beat A&M is a hard task, and you can’t realistically expect the Razorbacks to pull it off. On the flip side, if not now, when? Chad Morris has to be in a panic mode after how this season has started, and A&M could be a winnable game if the Hogs play their best. Still, you can’t expect much.
7. Mississippi State
Desperation level: Getting really into Fortnite in your 30s.
Joe Moorhead and Co. have to feel pretty good about where they’re at, and no matter what happens against Auburn, that probably won’t change. Sure, it would be nice to get a signature win and knock off a division rival. But are they desperate? Nah.
Desperation level: Visiting your old high school.
If you think Alabama gets nervous about regular season SEC games anymore, you haven’t been watching. You know the script, Tua will throw at least 2 50-yard touchdowns in the 1st quarter to his receiving corps that is more worried about rock, paper, scissors than beating the Ole Miss secondary. By the 3rd quarter he’ll be on the bench and it’ll all be chill. Alabama is anything but desperate.
Desperation level: Going to a Jimmy Buffett concert.
Florida has plenty of time to be desperate later in the year, but for now the Gators can play a stress-free game of football on Saturday and gear up for a massive one vs. Auburn next Saturday. Besides, how can you ever be desperate with the #TraskHive leading your team.
10. Ole Miss
Desperation level: Absolutely none.
Only one team should be desperate for a win against Alabama this year, and they’re in Athens. Ole Miss can lose by 70 on Saturday and no one would blame them. It’s not the worst spot to be in. Sure, the Rebs and this coaching staff still have plenty of questions to answer this season, but none of them involve Alabama