Fire Kalen DeBoer? Not so fast, my Alabama friends
By David Wasson
Published:
The word fan, of course, is shortened from fanatic – which has a literal meaning as “a person filled with excessive and single-minded zeal.”
Almost all of us are fans of something, whether it is our beloved college football team, our favorite band or Mom’s chocolate chip cookies. Pick your fandom, and you’ll find the highest hill on which to defend your zeal at all costs.
And then there are Alabama fans, a goodly portion of whom would ascend Mount Everest this morning to join the queue calling for the firing of Kalen DeBoer after Saturday’s season-opening disaster at Florida State.
To say that patience is running thin in Tuscaloosa and beyond following the Crimson Tide’s 31-17 loss to the Seminoles is an understatement. A more apt description would be that DeBoer’s stock – which wasn’t exactly triggering a bull market following his lackluster first season – is tanking like Tesla.
There are several reasons for this, of course, and we will start with the obvious: Alabama performed more like Mississippi State against Florida State in front of the entire TV-watching world Saturday. When the Crimson Tide weren’t getting out-hustled on the edges by the pint-sized terror that is FSU quarterback Tommy Castellanos, the Tide were getting pushed around by a Seminoles defense that mustered a grand total of 2 victories last season.
And DeBoer? He observed the proceedings in a crisp crimson polo (an upgrade, at least…) with all the fire of a supermarket assistant manager pondering his fingernails during inventory. We have seen sloths with more fire in their eyes, and the resultant effect of a head coach of the 18-time national champions stifling yawns while his team vastly underperforms was startling.
We would be remiss if we didn’t acknowledge the Saban Effect on all of this, too. Not too long ago, we fondly remember the brand of Joyless Murderball that Nick Saban and the Tide would unleash weekly on unranked opponents like the Seminoles – not allowing even the slightest glimmer of hope to shine on an opponent while also ass-chewing his players and coaches alike toward perfection.
The dichotomy between Saban and DeBoer isn’t just surface-deep, either. Prior to Saturday, Alabama had gone 24 years without losing a season opener (Dennis Franchione’s 2001 Alabama team fell to UCLA 20-17). And DeBoer is now a stomach-turning 6-4 against unranked teams at Alabama, while Saban smacked unranked teams to the tune of 124-4 at Alabama.
Between the loss itself and the way Florida State manhandled Alabama, it comes as no surprise that grumbles and whispers began to sound like full-fledged shouts and calls to realtors from Livingston to Lafayette and from Florence to Dothan – all sounding like this.
Fire Kalen DeBoer.
As a public service, we here at SDS are obligated to inform you why this likely won’t happen – at least not right now. For starters, cutting bait with DeBoer as the nation celebrates Labor Day would be an unprecedented display of quick triggering. We can’t recall a coach who got fired 1 game into his second season without some sort of off-the-field malfeasance, and while DeBoer might not be Saban 2.0, he hasn’t been caught with his hands in any untoward cookie jars.
Also, there is the not insignificant part about money. It would cost Alabama a cool $70 million to bid DeBoer sayonara in 2025 – and while the Crimson Tide raked in plenty during Saban’s championship runs, all their spare cash surely is spoken for. Now, would athletic director Greg Byrne pass the hat behind the scenes to scare up the necessary stacks of cash if the 1-game disaster becomes a multi-game trend?
The short answer to that one is… well, maybe. The Tide will likely be multi-touchdown favorites against Louisiana-Monroe on Saturday night at Bryant-Denny Stadium – but they also were almost 2-TD favorites against FSU and we saw how that turned out. Another dud against either the Warhawks or visiting Wisconsin on Sept. 13 would certainly crack open some influential checkbooks in a hurry.
This was supposed to be Alabama’s easy part of 2025, too, as it only gets tougher with a trip to Georgia looming Sept. 27 and dates with ranked SEC squads Tennessee, South Carolina, LSU and Oklahoma sure to test even the most pragmatic of Crimson Tide souls.
Now is not the time to go yanking on the nearest fire alarm, Tide Nation. Kalen DeBoer might be closer to Ron Zook 2.0 than the second coming of Savior Saban, but we simply do not know what the rest of 2025 will bring.
It may take quite the uphill climb, but don’t let your inner fandom get the better of you. Perhaps go touch some grass while attempting to avoid gloating Auburn fans in the process?
An APSE national award-winning writer and editor, David Wasson has almost four decades of experience in the print journalism business in Florida and Alabama. His work has also appeared in The New York Times, The Washington Post, the Los Angeles Times and several national magazines and websites. He also hosts Gulfshore Sports with David Wasson, weekdays from 3-5 pm across Southwest Florida and on FoxSportsFM.com. His Twitter handle: @JustDWasson.
