#ItMightMeanTooMuch: Bevo's Texas A&M poop bucket, and the ultimate tailgating statement piece
I have a bias, and I’m not afraid to admit it.
Uga is my favorite mascot in sports.
Deal with it. That bulldog strolls around like a boss, it attacks opposing players who get too close and it lives like a freaking king because it deserves to.
(On a totally related note, I desperately want to own a bulldog someday and name it “Murphy.” I would give it the Uga treatment and let it live the life it was meant to live.)
So when I saw that Uga was honored with an ice sculpture by a Georgia tailgater, needless to say, I was proud. The thought of someone sculpting Uga’s likeness into ice over the course of hours makes me smile.
Even more fitting? That the owner of Uga’s ice sculpture poured free shots through it for the masses:
This #GeorgiaBulldogs tailgater has a $400 ice sculpture of Uga on North Campus and is offering free shots through it. That punch looks potent. He had quite the line. pic.twitter.com/jxsbak5fOw
— Radi Nabulsi (@RadiNabulsi) September 21, 2019
That, my friends, is how it’s done.
You better believe he had “quite the line.” I’m not even a shots guy, but I’d essentially treat that experience like a 7-year-old waiting 4 hours in line at Disney World for the new “Frozen” ride. Even if that was my entire tailgating experience for the day, it’d be worth it.
When else am I going to be around a $400 booze luge sculpture of the world’s greatest mascot?
Sadly, the answer is “never.” Come to think of it, I’m not sure I’ve ever been around an ice sculpture, nor have I ever had the desire to purchase one. SEC fans are clearly different than I am.
Remember last year when a Kentucky fan got a “Benny 4 Heisman” ice sculpture? It was magnificent.
Unfortunately, I’m pretty sure that no alcohol was transported through the sculpture. Still, that’s an “A” for effort.
It begs the question — what’s something you love so much that you’d pull the trigger on an ice sculpture? Keep in mind that in addition to forking over at least a few hundred bucks, you need to have the means to preserve it. That’s major commitment for something that might only be used once.
Benny Snell and Uga are pretty worthy subjects, in my opinion. I wouldn’t be surprised to see a Bo Nix ice sculpture sometime soon, and I’m sure Tua Tagovailoa has had his likeness carved in something. Whether that’s ice or a Voodoo doll from an opposing fan base is unknown, but I feel pretty confident about that.
Uga remains No. 1 on my list, though.
Bevo’s poop has “A&M” written all over it
Speaking of Uga, remember when that bully Bevo tried to charge at him at the Sugar Bowl?
Uga vs. Bevo as a wildlife documentary (🔊⬆️) pic.twitter.com/WE7kJYg3Mb
— SportsNation (@SportsNation) January 2, 2019
Cool, bro. Pick on someone your own size.
Well, it appears that Bevo wasn’t finished attacking the SEC. In his latest bit of disorderly behavior, he’s now trolling Texas A&M with his poop. Yes, that’s right. Bevo’s manure bucket has an A&M logo on it with the words “13th man.”
Bevo’s manure bucket has an A&M logo and says “13th Man” 🐂💩😂 pic.twitter.com/tTEGQQHxiT
— RedditCFB (@RedditCFB) September 22, 2019
Jeez, Bevo. Obsessed with the SEC much?
This is coming from the school that barks at everyone who flashes a “Horns Down” at them. Of course the Longhorns would do something to try and troll A&M like this. This is about all Texas will do in terms of battling A&M because the former Big 12 rivals can’t work out an agreement to actually meet on the field.
At this point, A&M probably has some cold feet because it fears for the safety of Reveille. Bevo would undoubtedly make a charge at the Aggies’ mascot for no reason.
And if Reveille showed up wearing some sort of “Horns Down” towel, well, Godspeed to whoever is tasked with calming down that psycho Bevo.
It’s strange that a program so sensitive to trolling would make such a move to make sure A&M holds Bevo’s poop. It’s almost like having their own network isn’t enough and they want to be part of the SEC fun.
A couple of weeks ago, they opened College GameDay by shooting a cannon through Joe Burrow’s jersey … and then he proceeded to light the Longhorns up for a billion yards.
(And what was with the College GameDay piece on Bevo vs. Mike the Tiger? He’s a stinking tiger. Obviously he would destroy that attention-seeking steer.)
A couple of years ago, Tom Herman and Sam Ehlinger trolled Drew Lock’s touchdown celebration in the Texas Bowl. It was Ehlinger who called A&M “insecure” based on the advertising he saw at the Austin airport over the summer.
I stood in one spot waiting for my bags and took these pictures. #Insecurities pic.twitter.com/TNTAsAjAzh
— Sam Ehlinger (@sehlinger3) March 22, 2019
I’d say an unprompted decision to make your mascot’s poop bucket a thing about A&M is pretty insecure. But hey, that’s just me.
And last I checked, if you really are elite and secure with your public perception, you shouldn’t have to announce “we’re baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack.”
Texas is going to do whatever it needs to do to portray that it’s nationally relevant. I get that. That’s Marketing 101.
But anything — and I mean anything — that involves Bevo harming a single hair on Uga’s head should result in Texas getting the death penalty.
OK, I’ll admit that Uga is officially my #ItMightMeanTooMuch.