Each week, I’ll be taking a coach to the bar. Not literally, although that would be way more cool. Whether they had a great game, a terrible game, or I just want to hang out with that coach for no real reason. Basically there is no metric here, I just get to choose, so deal with it. 

 

This weeks bar buddy: Will Muschamp

Coach Boom had a really stressful Saturday. It probably even continued into Sunday. The Gators had a really tough time getting past Kentucky. But they did, even if it brought Muschamp within an inch of his life. My man needs to relax, otherwise he could end up in the hospital sooner rather than later.

 

MD: “So, coach, how are you feeling?”

WM: “I’m exhausted, I can’t believe the game went that late.”

MD: “Yeah those triple overtimes generally last pretty long.”

WM: “I was not expecting that.”

MD: “I don’t think anyone was, coach. What do you think the reason you struggled so much?”

WM: “I have no idea, maybe I wasn’t angry enough, or didn’t yell loud enough.”

MD: “That isn’t possible. Also, I’m pretty sure that has no bearing on the actual game anyway.”

WM: “Oh no, it’s a fact. Getting super mad and yelling so loud that it looks like you’ll pop multiple veins at the same is good for a few wins.”

MD: “But you went 4-8 last year.”

WM: “Yeah, exactly.”

MD: “Wait, so you’re saying you won those 4 games because you went all ‘Coach Boom’?”

WM: “No doubt.”

MD: “Okay. So what is your plan for Alabama this week?”

WM: “I’m going to get super mad at everyone. Yell till there are zeros on the clock.”

MD: “Boom, I gotta tell you, I don’t think that is a good game plan. I think you need to actually do some coaching too.”

WM: “Nah, I think the players all know what to do.”

MD: “Um, it seems like that’s not true. Two of Kentucky’s touchdowns were on blown coverages and Driskel doesn’t go through any progressions.”

WM: “What are progressions?”

MD: “You really don’t know much about offense, huh?”

WM: “I really don’t.”

MD: “That seems like a problem. You should work on that. I’ll go ahead and get the bill so you can look up some offense stuff.”

WM: “YELLING LOUD INDISCERNIBLE THINGS“

MD: “I can’t even understand you. I’m just gunna pay and leave.”

WM: “See? Yelling got you to pay for the check. That’s a win.”

MD: “I was always going to pay. I invited you. That’s how it works, yelling does nothing, like I said earlier.”

WM: “Says you.”

MD: “Okay, Boom.”